I started writing this post the other day but the post just never would gel. I couldn’t figure out why I couldn’t put my thoughts together, and I realized it’s because I literally could not see an ending for this crap.
And today there was an announcement at the place where I work: the return to the office has been postponed until June at the earliest, and September for the bulk of the work force. I’m “the bulk of the workforce” because I can do my job just fine from home if I have to, so, yeah.
We were sent home from the office in mid-March, and all of us figured it’d be weeks, a month or two at the outside, and now, 18-ish months?
The sheer endlessness of this COVID clusterfuck is getting to a lot of us – at least to those of us who are still paying attention. I’ve gained weight, I’m crabby, I’m having trouble concentrating, I’m online “comfort shopping” too much. And you know what? I realized today that I don’t give a fuck, because I need to do what I can do to stay sane through this.
Actually I very much do give a fuck about the weight gain, because my clothes have to fit. Hot weather is looming, and I can’t afford to replace the shorts that now won’t button. I need to get control over my diet and exercise, for a multitude of healthy reasons. And also because I’m on a mission to fit into all of my shorts and tanks, because they’re all perfectly good and weren’t cheap and it’s going to be 90-fucking-degrees in a few weeks.
But the rest of it? If trying new skin care products and buying yarn and pretty stationery and growing succulents helps me not stab anybody, I refuse to feel guilty.
I need a game plan, or I’m going to outgrow my entire wardrobe and forget how to communicate with words. I’m afraid that by June I’ll speak only in technobabble, acronym and spreadsheet. Oh, and dog baby talk, because my dogs are the cutest little babies ever and deserve ALL the treaty-treats, don’t they? Yeah, I’m a bit starved for fun, non-work conversation.
Blogging about it really does help, and I will do it more often. I appreciate the feedback for my intermittent posts.
As I’ve said, I’m not really “quarantining” like the cool bread baking and indulging in creativity people, I’m more like “imprisoned” in a home office doing a job I fervently wish I could afford to quit, but alas, retirement is still a few years away for me.
So I’m going to put together a game plan to get me through 2021, because this shit ain’t anywhere near over.
I’m with you on the game plan need. I’m just…existing. They split my office into two groups and we alternate weeks in the office and at home, with deep cleanings over the weekend. Can’t use the kitchen, microwave or fridge, have to disinfect after using the bathroom, and basically not seeing anyone because we’re all holed up in our offices. It’s a change of scene at least, but the isolation at the office isn’t much better. Very very thankful that I’m still working though.
I desperately need to get back to some kind of regular exercise, joints are starting to creak and groan and heaven forbid I have to climb a bunch of stairs.
It helps to know that I’m not the only one!
You’re right. it’s nowhere near over. And I’ll say it again, your blog posts are a bright spot in my day, and in the ocean of self and business promotion that has taken over the blogosphere. I’m with you on being starved for connection and conversation. sigh.
Down here in Homestead, we are already headed for summer. It’s been in the mid-80s with very high humidity and afternoon showers. I’m longing for the cool front we’re supposed to get on Sunday/Monday. I’m comfort shopping Michaels for thick yarn for quick gratification knitting then having little to no concentration for even the the most simple pattern.
I keep muttering, this, too, shall pass. A person can dream, eh? Hope the rest of your week goes well.