Really, Nicole?

So, yeah, we are a week into November and about to get hit by a tropical storm/sub-tropical storm (that’s a weather geek thing but makes no difference while it’s happening at your house) or maybe an actual fucking HURRICANE. Really.

So, right when I make a plan to get my ass out to walk daily, our forecast is now wind and rain from Tuesday night until Friday, because OF COURSE. We had plans to hit Epcot Food and Wine on Friday, because my daughter’s county takes Veterans Day as a holiday, and I was going to burn a vacation day, but now we’re rescheduled for Sunday, because Nicole.

Meh, whatever. I bought a couple of nice new camping lanterns after Ian, when I discovered that while I had a ton of batteries on hand, the bulbs in two of my better lanterns had died. I have pet food, people food, potty pads, cat litter, all the things, I’m good.

I’m getting my hair cut tomorrow after work, and not a moment too soon. I had this crazy idea that I’d let my hair grow in “just a bit” to see if maybe I wanted to go for a short layered bob or something, and it isn’t working for me. I’ve always had fine hair but a TON of it, and now I have fine, thin, old lady hair. It’d take a lot of time, styling, and product to achieve even a very short cute layered bob, and yeah, that’s not me.

Then right on cue, Florida reminded me that hair that needs to be styled is not for me, because my life is sweaty. Sweaty plus hats, baseball caps, and now and then a hardhat. We’ll be back to the semi-Jamie Lee Curtis (semi because my hair refuses to do pretty silver) short tomorrow, right as Nicole starts making herself known.

So, my few but loyal readers, please cross your fingers or mutter a prayer or whatever you do to send good juju, because I’m about to drop a couple grand at the end of the month to pay off our February cruise. I’m of course catastrophizing, because that is what I do about absolutely everything. I’m convinced that because we got through Ian unscathed, Nicole is here to take the roof off the “investment” property my daughter rents, and I’ll have to shell out a hurricane deductible and there goes the cruise.

It’s what I do, I was trained to do it from birth, seriously. I was raised as the kid who, if I tried to do a cartwheel, would get told I’d break my neck. I’m aware of it and I mock it, but it’s still a thing I live with. I let go just a bit with my own kids, (I remember screaming at my parents when they tried to scare the shit out of them) but I’m sure it still hovered over me, because my parents still were around to tell me how I was doing parenting wrong.

I think I’ve broken that cycle with my granddaughters. I’m proud that though I was always in terror when The Kid did an aerial at dance, I never let her know. But it’s a deeply ingrained training psychological damage, and I’m 64 and still fighting it.

So, anyway, other than my anxiety having a new place to focus this week, besides the election, my daughter and I spent last night finalizing cruise plans for when I make that whopping final payment at the end of this month.

For those who just wandered into this blog somehow, we are going on a three day cruise on the Disney Wish, and we are irrationally excited about it. It’s me, my daughter, and The Kid, and none of us have ever been on a cruise. I really never thought I’d enjoy one, but as I’m a Disnerd and a former coworker emailed me out of the blue to say she’d just been on the Wish with her family, and on and on, the stars converged and after a perhaps wine influenced conversation with my daughter, we decided that this was our big Christmas present. The Kid will get a suitcase from me, with a picture of the ship inside. (She really needs a suitcase, the busted bag she dragged around this summer was ridiculous.)

So, we have our shore experiences planned: We will be doing an up close meeting with sea lions in Nassau, then snorkling on Castaway Cay. It’s only a 3 day cruise and there’s dining adventures and that awesome tube ride on the ship so we’re thinking two shore adventures plus just hanging out will be plenty. My former coworker fellow Disnerd is going to share some cruise veteran tips with us. We’ve been a bit busy with real work and now another damn storm.

I will tell my anxiety to STFU, about everything.